Listen to the Lion

Swift Justice

I was having dinner with a couple of friends of mine - both fellow members of the Vast Right-Wing Conspiracy, Ohio Branch - the day after the election. We were savoring our Ruth's Chris steaks and reflecting on all of the people who deserve credit for the President's great victory. Bush himself, Cheney, Rove, various members of the Ohio Bush-Cheney/Republican campaign all were mentioned, but the group that truly warmed the cockles of our hearts was the Swift Vets and POWs for Truth.

They get mad props for calling Kerry on his self-evidently self-serving attacks on his fellow vets after his short stint in Vietnam, an action that, in a sane country that valued honor, would have caused his politcal career to be stillborn.

And, even though during the campaign they served up several unfunny, Jon Stewart-esque liberal clunkers, The Onion recently served up the priceless: "Swift Boat Veterans Still Hounding Kerry."

If they really were, it wouldn't be so bad. Kerry deserves it.

This year's best album

My review of Brian Wilson's SMiLE at NRO.

Voters to Springsteen: "You're not the Boss of me"

I’ve spent the last couple of weeks working for and then recovering from the Bush campaign in Ohio – details about my adventures to come soon – and that’s why I haven’t posted anything lately.

One of the best things about this past week is hearing the losers’ post-mortem of a campaign that started in a ditch and never stopped digging. Kerry pointed out Bush’s vulnerability, but ol' Lurch never gave anyone a reason to vote for him – not that he could have come up with a good one anyway.

Only with the out-of-control liberal media could a candidate who was 1) the most liberal senator 2) a dishonorable, slanderous Vietnam war protestor and 3) as charming as a fencepost come as close to winning as he did, which wasn’t that close after all.

Another way to gloat in the privacy of your own home is to check out this ridiculous clip from the “Vote for Change” tour grand finale. I caught it on VH1 a couple of days before the election and marveled at all the priceless comedic elements it contains, including:

1. the fabulously flouncing Michael Stipe
2. Natalie Maines, the short Dixie Chick, looking like Stevie Nicks after a Krispy Kreme binge
3. Dave Matthews intensely delivering lyrics he’s reading off a teleprompter
4. Eddie Vedder intensely delivering lyrics he’s reading off a teleprompter
5. Max Weinberg (always funny because of his association with Conan O’Brien)
6. a bunch of token black guys who can’t carry a tune in a bucket
7. Jackson Browne, who has his own way of acting unilaterally
8. the lyrics, courtesy of poetess Patti Smith
9. Bruce Springsteen hemorrhaging artistic credibility right before your eyes
10. the third-rate Springsteen who hasn’t written a decent song in 15 years, John Mellencamp

A friend of mine chastised me for not including a Bruce album in my all-time top 10 list, and he has a point. Darkness on the Edge of Town really should be there, but I think that my subconscious bumped it because of Bruce’s decision to campaign for Kerry. I can’t fathom how someone could produce The Rising and then support a candidate whose policy is – wait, we can change the tense on that – was to wait until we are attacked again before taking action.

These “Vote for Change” guys – along with Michael Moore, P. Diddy, et. al. – really got out the vote didn’t they?

By the way, “Vote for Change” t-shirts are 50% off right now at the Dave Matthews Band web site.